volnixshin:

simonalkenmayer:

kitchensylph:

simonalkenmayer:

*raises a hand*

I know how. It’s illegal, but cheap.

….

Go on…

Haunted House, a recipe

Tools:

  • literally anything (Anything is a weapon, but I tend to prefer my bare hands. If you cannot use your bare hands, a fork, pen, pan, rolling pin, pick axe, rat poison, industrial engine lubricant, skewer, crossbow, spare keys, old shoe, spray can and light will suffice)

Ingredients:

  • a person you really cannot stand or feel the world would benefit from losing,
  • your house.

Instructions:

  1. Invite person to your house.
  2. Take implement and insert in person

How will fisting someone make my house haunted?

Why would you go there? Clearly you didn’t read the instructions. And you immediately thought of anal insertion rather than insertion into say…an eye socket, which incidentally kills very quickly, or say…the abdominal cavity.

I tell you, if it came to only the anus, I could easily kill someone that way to…though come to think of it, I haven’t.

This seems like an oversight.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑

%d bloggers like this: