honestly I don’t have the slightest idea what your blog is about at all but I’d like to thank you for being like that because my sister is really uh?? invested?? and it makes my day to see her happy even tho all she says is simon this and simon that

If you read the FAQ, you will see that this blog is an experiment and human behavior. It’s really very simple, in that all the readers agree to the rules. I will tell you details about my life, some of which will be obscured so as to protect my location. This includes details on my website, publications, my reflections upon current events, recipes, historical events I witnessed, and so forth. I never give any photographic or auditory or video proof of anything pertaining to my specific reality. I will then put out surveys and other means of data collection, in which readers will participate. I will ask all sorts of questions, but the most important one is about what they believe.

To that end, the blog is something of a communal space. We have very strict rules of behavior, which I moderate. I endeavor to be kind and polite and compassionate so as to make this interaction as smooth as possible. I entertain my readers through some light humor and “SPOOPY“ references.

You may scroll through if you wish, hang about and participate, read the FAQ and sod off, or jump Feetfirst into the rabbit hole as your sister appears to have done.

I am a monster, in that I am a non-human species. My principal dietary requirement is human flash. I’m not Cruel or bizarre about it. In fact I’m rather scientific. Accept that as the foundation of our interaction and you will be quite at home here.

All that being said, I’m very happy to be of such service to your sister. I do hope that she enjoys her time here. I do endeavor to make it as friendly and easy an experience as possible.

You should, however, warn her off becoming too fixated. Not altogether healthy. Im charming, most of the time, but I do eat people. It’s always good to remain vigilant for one’s safety and peace of mind.

Welcome to both of you.

Simon, I survived my sister’s wedding. I realized over this week that I have no family. They’re all extremely racist, homophobic, and just not friendly people. And I started crying because I realized if I ever had a wedding, none of them would come except to insult me. I did what I could to help my sister and she said maybe 5 words to me, my brother only insulted me, and my dad laughed about me behind my back. Most of the wedding party didn’t know I even existed. Yay? -R.K.V. Age, 20

Let it give you some perspective. The people we encounter along our path are far more important than the ones who happened to push us out into the world. A lot of people say, “oh well, but if they didn’t do that I wouldn’t be here!“ But that’s all a lot of stufin nonsense. For them it was the luck of the draw. They put you out possibly with some thought, but without the ability to know how their way of life my conflict with yours, or who you might become. People you choose along the way come to you because of who you are.

You are not beholden to your past, to your blood, to any person or entity that offends you even if you come from it. Those things do not define you. You define you.

That thought, that your family won’t be at your wedding, shouldn’t dismay you. That should make you very happy. Who would want such people around them on the happiest day of their life? Now I know that it’s the general idea of lacking family that upsets you, but as I’ve said it’s the luck of the draw, while your friends, are intentional. I’d rather be alone in this world, than surrounded by terrible vicious bastards, personally. So realize your nature, humans are pack animals. You are social creature and what you crave is that sociability, that camaraderie. You can find that anywhere, and in larger supply, without strictures or conditions. You can make your own family that is supportive and true. So see this as the opportunity to know where you stand and set out on that quest to surround yourself with people who are authentic, compassionate, kind.

I used to comfort myself in dealing with these sorts of people by saying, “oh well they will have miserable lives.“ And now I realize how naïve that was, and frankly how silly. Yes they will have miserable lives, but because they are so stupid, they will never know that their lives are miserable. Because they are so self-centered, all the things that occur to them because of their transgressions, all their consequences, will be the faults of others and not their own. They will have tiny narrow existences, which they might conceive to be rather nice. However you and I will know that their lives are narrow, their perspective shallow, their experience one layer deep. So, now, I no longer say that to myself. Instead I say, “thank heaven they’re stupid enough not to feel their own misery.“ What a lovely condition that is, to never be mindful of your own faults.

That’s the trouble with you, you see. You remind them that there’s things outside of their experience that exist. They cannot tolerate that, and so they reject you. Their treatment of you is an extension of their unmitigated imbecility. How wondrous you are, that you manage to pull yourself out of such muck. How the devil did you even come to be? It’s somewhat magical.

So don’t see yourself as the cast off of a group of people to whom you are bow beholden. See yourself as the improbable, exceptional vanguard From humble beginnings. Because that is actually the truth and not the conditioning that they are attempting to use to control you.

You did your best for others, which is a credit to you, and their behavior is a discredit to them. That is all I see from the situation, all anyone of substance will see. You did your best, while they did their least.

Now bugger off, and stop speaking to them. You don’t need villains like that in your life. Look at it this way, if the universe saw fit to birth you from those villains, you’ve had more than your fair share. So look at it as an opportunity to work toward your statistically probable happiness.

(1/2) Hello Simon. I think I’m in some trouble. I had to quit my job because of something wrong with my stomach making me unable to work it. I’ve applied to about a dozen jobs that so far have hired other people instead, and my doctor recently ordered blood tests that showed kidney and liver abnormalities. We’re still waiting for a couple more tests, but I don’t know what I’m going to do. All of this bad news, one event after another, is making my anxiety and depression flare up really badly.

I’ve given advice on these kinds of matters many times. You might try looking through my Simon gives advice tag.

I think the only thing to do really is to find a way to compartmentalize everything so that it can be accomplished, even if in small increments. As for bad news and how to handle it, I’m afraid that’s the education of a lifetime. Every person comes by that in the course of their life, and by experience only. Well I have experienced many terrible things and often at once, finding a way to cope with the sensation that the universe is against one seems to me to be as simple as realizing that the universe doesn’t know you exist. There’s no mind behind it. There simply a loose organization of chaos and body by you and those around you. As soon as you realize that the universe doesn’t know you exist, you can begin to look at all of the circumstantial coincidences that appear to be negative as humorously compound it against you. You have strange luck.

However feelings of helplessness and depression and anxiety all indicate that you are in need of some sort of therapy or counseling. Therefore I recommend that in addition to changing how you think about these events that are occurring, you need to seek out some sort of mental health care. I would also recommend that you do some sort of a grounding exercise for at least a half hour a day. I know that you probably worked very hard all day long, and that you spend a great deal of time focusing on these issues. But for a half hour day, at least try to shut off all the electronics in the room, do some deep breathing, and do something physical like yoga or stretching. Just enough to get your heart rate up and release endorphins. Make it as nice as you like, as relaxing as you can. Don’t use it as a time to think about this problem. Try to ignore the problem completely, and focus only on your State of mind and health in that moment. When you begin to take little increments of time just to focus yourself, you’re all over aspect will improve, and you’ll be able to devote more mental energy to the problems because you will have more energy to expand in the first place.

I also think my readers may have some ideas as to how to obtain employment, or possibly even how they endured a similar situation that they’ve been through. My advice is largely tempered by my experience, which is very different from yours. When I experienced a great deal of stress my tendency is to eat. This has the general effect of realigning my neurochemistry. I also have something of a different sensory input, and so I don’t think I feel is disconnected from life as humans tend to. So it’s difficult for me to advise in these matters.

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